Why Coaching Matters for Planter Wives
“My personal experience, and observation of dozens of church planting couples, all but confirm that the Enemy sends disproportionate chaos into the life of Church Planting Wives. This is shrewd as most men are more affected by their wife’s suffering, than their own. Compounding the problem is the fact that most church planters have a coach and regular touches with other leaders where support is extended while their wives are mostly isolated and unsupported. This remains one of the biggest “misses” in our thinking about healthy, sustained church planting.”
— Duke Revard, Director of the Soma Family of Churches
Church planting is a wonderful calling. It is an incredible opportunity to join our Father in His mission to reconcile the world to Himself through Christ. Couples enter this journey with excitement and anticipation. Over time, however, they can find themselves struggling and discouraged. This is true for both the planter and his spouse, but research shows that while there are various resources for supporting planters, many planting wives feel isolated and alone in the journey.
The type of support that can be most beneficial to planting wives comes from women who possess an understanding of church planting and know how to listen and ask appropriate questions without judgement or quick fixes. Support systems can help wives cultivate and maintain healthy rhythms of grace, allowing her to grow strong even when planting gets tough.
NAMB Send Network recognizes this need and is working toward providing coaching support for planting spouses. Send Network coaches receive training and experience in coaching. They also display a heart for Christ and supporting church planter wives.
These coaches come alongside the planting spouse, helping her fully live out her calling. Many planting wives do not feel they have a safe place to process their unique challenges and struggles. Coaches provide a confidential environment that allows her to process and explore. She is able to generate choices based on her context and what she believes God is saying to her.
The following email is from a church planting spouse in Brooklyn, NY who was receiving peer coaching as part of her own coach training.
I wanted to take a moment and thank you for the peer coach training. I just got off the phone with my coaching practice partner to go over peer coaching guide 3. It was so refreshing to be able to share open and honestly without being judged. I know that it is just practice for us, but the questions are great and help a person to open up. It also helps to be accountable to someone. -Melinda Pacheco
For the Kingdom
Steve Addison describes coaching this way:
“The relational process of co-operating with the Holy Spirit that unlocks a person’s God-given potential so that they become more like Christ and make their unique contribution to the kingdom.”
Each church planting spouse has a unique contribution to make to the kingdom. She has tremendous influence in her home, church plant and community. A coaching relationship can help her live out her calling in life-giving ways that bring glory to Christ.